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Linus Torvalds facts

Linus Torvalds once found a segmentation fault in the universe.
Linus Torvalds can run kill -9 and kill Chuck Norris.
Linus Torvalds doesn’t die, he simply returns zero.
Linus Torvalds first written program had artificial intelligence.
Linus can divide by zero.
Linus Torvalds runs Linux on his wristwatch and toster.
Linus Torvalds doesn’t receive error messages.
There is no theory of probability, just a list of events that Linus Torvalds allows to occur.
Linus Torvalds does not sleep. He hacks.
Linus surfs the web using nothing but netcat.
Linus Torvalds can play 3D games in his head by interpreting the source code in real-time.
Linus made the red pill.
Linus Torvalds didn’t learn from the University of Helsinki, the University of Helsinki learned from Linus Torvalds.
Linus Torvalds once developed a programming language so good that it makes python look like punch cards.
Linus Torvalds doesn’t need to boot.
Linus is real, unless declared Integer.
Linus doesn’t push the flush toilet button. He simply says “make clean”.
Linus Torvalds has no dependencies.
Linus Torvalds takes one look at your desktop and knows which porn sites you visited. In the last ten years.
Linus Torvalds sleeps with nunchucks.
Linus can enrich himself simply by chowning your bank account. He does not do this because there is no challenge in it.
There are no man pages for Linus Torvalds, only god pages.
Linus Torvalds can do an infinite loop in five seconds… in his head.
Linus Torvalds doesn’t wear glasses anymore not because he had laser eye surgery, but because he finally got his xorg.conf properly configured in his head.
Linus Torvalds can use a nice level lower than -20.
Linus Torvalds doesn’t need to mount his drives.
Linus Torvalds doesn’t debug. His programs are always perfect.
Linus Torvalds can install Linux on a dead badger.
Linus Torvalds doesn’t need backups. He just uploads his files and lets the world mirror them.
Linus Torvalds is taking over the world. Microsoft is just a diversion so that no one would suspect a mild mannered Finnish programmer.
Linus Torvalds already has Linux 3.0. He is just keeping it to himself to build suspense.
Linus Torvalds didn’t design Linux to run on the 386. Intel designed the 386 to run Linux.
People pray to Jesus, but Jesus prays to Linus Torvalds.
Linus need not worry about Microsoft patent crap, he simply do `sudo mv /tmp/ms /dev/null`.
Linus Torvalds is more powerful than root.
If you could read Linus Torvald’s mind, you’d find that his stream of conciousness is entirely in binary.
Linus scared A and B away, so they had to make C.
Linus only has 2 buttons on his keyboard ‘1’ and ‘0’
Linus’s kernel never panics.
Linus does not use the GCC, he _writes_ binaries.

Fuente: Linux Screw

Categories: Internet, Linux Tags: , ,
  1. MikeTheC
    January 23rd, 2009 at 13:54 | #1

    Linus doesn’t use emacs macros. Emacs uses Linus macros.

  2. blaat
    May 31st, 2009 at 14:41 | #2

    Linus can recover files from /dev/null

  3. Cyberman
    November 20th, 2009 at 07:58 | #3

    Have you ever seen somebody lick the chutney spoon in an Indian Restaurant and put it back? This would never have happened under the Tories.

  4. John
    November 20th, 2009 at 08:46 | #4

    When Linus Torvalds sends an email the www does not dare break it into packets… it just sweats as it works out the fastest route and then sends it whole.

  5. November 20th, 2009 at 11:35 | #5

    Linus’ dreams in vim

  6. Hank
    November 20th, 2009 at 11:40 | #6

    Linus uses the bit bucket as his shopping cart.

  7. Hm…
    November 20th, 2009 at 17:09 | #7

    For Linus Torvalds, 640k is enough

  8. James
    November 20th, 2009 at 21:06 | #8

    I especially liked “There is no theory of probability, just a list of events that Linus Torvalds allows to occur.”

  9. Jigsaw
    November 21st, 2009 at 23:28 | #9

    Brilliant list!!!

  10. Karthik Shankar
    December 1st, 2009 at 17:35 | #10

    How did multicores come into picture?
    Once Linus got pissed with single core and punched it on its face!

  11. Sid
    December 30th, 2009 at 07:31 | #11

    Programming languages no longer follow “Turing completeness”, instead, they follow “Torvalds completeness”.

  12. April 3rd, 2010 at 13:30 | #12

    Hey, I actually translated some Linus Torvalds Facts into German: http://www.sebastianbartsch.de/linus_trovalds_facts.php – you may send me some new LTFs 😉

  13. February 16th, 2012 at 11:58 | #13

    Great list of Facts.

  14. Diego
    July 10th, 2012 at 14:44 | #14

    Linus Torvalds is amazing, Linus for life.

  15. dbro
    July 10th, 2012 at 14:47 | #15

    Linus Torvalds does not program. He stares at an unfinished program until it writes itself out of fear.

  16. TeeDotOol
    July 11th, 2012 at 00:41 | #16

    Linus doesn’t need drivers for Nvidia cards, they just work for him.

  17. isacdaavid
    December 21st, 2012 at 15:28 | #17

    Microkernel architecture was supposed to be better till Linus stopped using Minix.

  18. isacdaavid
    December 21st, 2012 at 17:02 | #18

    Once Linus was asked for his motivations behind writing his own kernel. After he answered GNU Hurd and 386 BSD had to exist. 😉

  1. January 21st, 2010 at 10:41 | #1
  2. May 19th, 2010 at 23:36 | #2

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